We are leaving the house in less than half an hour so R can take his driver's license exam and oddly enough, I am so anxious about it that I wish to throw up. But I'm not sure what I'm anxious about. If he fails, that'll be bad, but if he passes, he'll start driving my car. By himself.
If he fails, he'll be sad and mad and disappointed and that will all suck. If he succeeds, all of our car conversations -- which really are some of our best conversations these days, because it takes about twenty minutes to take him to his friends' houses -- will come to an end. No more racing to identify the pop music on the radio, no more debates about philosophy, no more looking-straight-ahead-let's-talk-about-something-awkward opportunities.
And having written it out, I feel much better.
I hope he passes. And when he does, I will simply have to make sure that we still go places together sometimes.
I see your dilemma. Of course, in the end you have to wish him success.
ReplyDeleteHe passed. Yay, him! And I am relieved that I never have to do that again, because the twenty minutes waiting for his return and the two hours that surrounded it were not pleasant.
ReplyDeleteHa ha I know the feeling of anticipation! I just took my test last week and I stressed the whole day until I took it!
ReplyDeleteThe actual test itself part was horrible. So glad that's over with. I hope yours went well, too!
ReplyDelete(I keep hoping to need something from the store, so I can say to him, 'hey, go get some milk' or whatever. It's going to be so much fun!)